... About Why I Write

People might attempt to pick up a pen and a paper for different reasons. Each one might have his/her own justifications. Some might say they write to earn a name for themselves, while some to change the world. A few have said they do it to feel alive. Well.. my defence is I write because I simply hate to die of suffocation or of asphyxiation. As weird and exaggerated as it sounds, yes... 

I write the most when there is too much held inside and needs an outlet. 

I write when I need to let the pent up anger, sorrow and disgust out.

I write because I have this overwhelming urge to do it.

I write because if I don't, I fear the world closing in on me. 

I write to set me free.

I write to calm my erratic heart beats.

I write because it is my way of running away. 
I write when nothing or nobody can help me. 

I write when I can steal some solitude when it gets denied. 

I write not because I have something to say. Though I do that rarely when I am forced to, by an external force, like people! 

I write not for people to judge me as a person. Of course, you can judge me as a writer. 

I may or may not write about the immediate distress in hand. 

I may or may not be writing about you, or even about me. When I pick up the pen and the paper, or log on to my system to write, I am totally in the dark about what to write.

I write so that I can get it done and go back to my life, a bit more composed. 

I write not because it's my hobby or my career, but because it is my lifeline to sanity. 

Mission accomplished for the day. I can feel the air. 

... Of A Googler

Right from the various assignments I did during my MA to the almost daily welcome speeches and thank you notes, my life is thoroughly indebted to Google!

This topic came out of the blue for me when quite randomly  I told a friend of mine that if I'd ever write an autobiography some day one whole chapter would be dedicated to Google! So then, this post can be a prequel to it.

Who found what? 

Who is the father of whom? 

Did they really get hitched? 

What to make for dinner today? 

How to write a novel? 

How famous is my friend? 

What does that word mean again? 

Is there a hartal tomorrow? 

How mad am I? 

When did Maya Angelou die? 

Where on earth am I now? 

What is all the row about Saritha Nair?

Why is my 3-year old too stubborn? 

... n number of questions I asked Google, and it did reply faithfully.

Google has made me quite humbler, as it has made me understand I know nothing when compared to the vast knowledge it possesses. Google has made me respect my elders more. Didn't they acquire their degrees and write essays and papers with no help from Google? It has made me respect time even more. If it were not for Google, millions of seconds of lethargy would have been converted to useless activities of search, find, write, edit, re-search, re-find, re-write and re-edit.

Yes, I am a Googler and insanely proud of being one. 

... Of A Drapetomaniac

CID! Escape! That is a very famous dialogue from a good old Malayalam comedy movie. Now, this is what I feel like yelling when in life's many situations. 

Oh! Its going to rain ... Escape!

My god, sister is coming... Escape!

Oh no! She will now start again on my bad choices of dressing... Escape! 

Shucks! If I go with them, I too will have to work on it .... How to Escape?! 

Well.. seeing my constant urge to run away, you might think I am a marathon runner. But on the contrary, I don't remember myself running anywhere at any time, without actually tripping on thin air and falling down. So then, how exactly am I a drapetomaniac? 

Have you ever been in one of life's inescapable situations, where you feel trapped and find that constant urge to run away to some place you feel safe. I feel it many a time. It is just the urge to run, but never to actually pick up the courage, put on the running shoes, and just run. So, if that is the case, you will surely find out that I have covered the whole wide world at least twice.  

Certain people make you want to run away, certain places make you feel like escaping, and even certain memories make you want to run away from them. 

Now for some trivia, the term drapetomania was first used in the mid 1800s to define the mental disorder of slaves who ran away from their masters. And the cruel white masters thought that the slaves who ran away from their merciless, vicious regimes were out of their minds! Believe it or not, the treatment given to the "disorder" was confinement, shackling, starvation, threats, and physical torture!!!

Now, if drapetomania is a disease or a mental disorder, I don't think confinement or threats will help me. Just let me free, I will not run away anywhere!